I thought I would shut myself off. I thought maybe that's cool. Maybe that's what you have to do to become a genius is you have to be mad. So if you can get mad before the word genius, then maybe you can make genius appear. Right? That doesn't work either.
And I'm in a good place. I've paced myself pretty well. I'm 30, I've seen some cool stuff. I made a lot of stuff happen for myself. I made a lot of stuff happen for myself. That's a really cool sentence when you're in your 20s, right? "I made it happen for myself." But all that means is that I've just somehow or another found a way to synthesize love. Or synthesize soothing. You can't get that, and what I'm saying is I've messed with all the approaches except for one, and it's gonna sound really corny, but that's just love. That's just love.
I've done everything in my life that I've wanted to do except just give and feel love for my living. And I don't mean like, uh, Roman candle, fireworks, Hollywood hot pink love. I mean, like, "I got your back"-love. I don't need to hear "I love ya." You guys love me. I love you. We got that down. But some of the people who would tell you they love ya were the last people to just have your back. So I'm gonna experiment with this love thing. Giving love. Feeling love. I know it's corny but it's the last thing I've got to check out before I check out."
This is a excerpt from one the most amazing, brilliant, inspiring people of my generation. He speaks with such heart and eloquence, speaks from a place that is personal for him and is not willing to allow people around him to control his path.
Has he made mistakes, yes! Has he embarrassed himself, yes! Has he failed, yes! Does everyone love and respect him, No! Has he had best friends that have left him after he moved onto a new life, yes! Does his parents and siblings still love and support him no matter the choices and shenanigans he may get into, yes! Has he mastered his talent, yes! Has he made a difference in the world, yes! Has he allowed the world around him to bring him down, make up a story about who and what he is? No!!
Have I been in the same shoes, yes!! (different size, same brand)
His words speak to me. They feel as if they are my own. The above statement he makes is my new mantra....my newness in action. It is mine to say thank you for the previous life I lived, so I say it, I write it, THANK YOU..and enter into a state of 'I Got Your Back Love." It is my turn world....my turn to rock the boat and make an off the hook statement. The question is, are you ready for the Kristin? Kristin is ready for it!!!!
Many times in a day we may day dream of the 'what if's' and the reality you are living the what if's. Last night, One of my most favorite friends Jami said to me "Everything you have done in life has brought you to this very moment!" To hear that makes it more real. i have absolutely brought myself to this very moment in time. Everything in my life is a complete result of the choices and actions I took. Now I get to make new choices. And sometimes i choose D. All of the Above!
(Thank you John Mayer for your words......I left this as the last line so people would read all the way through without any JM judgement!!!)
Make good choices....be yourself.....
KnM
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