'shuffle' is the new psycic

 You simply ask the question, hit shuffle on your i (Phone,Touch, Pod) and there you have it, a universal affirmation to your question. No matter the question, big or small, your music library holds the answer.  You not only get the answer, you also get a nice 3-5 minute answer that has a beat, a tune, and if your lucky some significance to your life.

Is there anything better than asking the question

"Am i ever going to find true love?"

----------------------shuffle--------------------

Answer "Child of the Ghetto" by P Diddy,

seriously brilliant! that completely answers my question. I mean day in and day out pondering the question humans everywhere ask "true love, am i worthy? will i find it? will it find me?" and for P Diddy to sing to you....
" A child of the ghetto, nobody explain it to me
Livin the scripture the picture they painted for me
Knew what it wasn't, it wasn't the game or the greed
Rippin it runnin and gunnin and aimin for me
A child of the ghetto, nobody explain it to me
Livin the scripture the picture they painted for me"

(Insert uncomfortable sarcastic laughter here)

I mean does shuffle have that much control over me? Why yes it has and yes it does! Hit that shuffle again. get that answer you want. Do it. Do it! 


"Am i ever going to find true love?"
----------------------Shuffle---------------------------

Counting Crows- Round Here 


Nope, that's not good enough


----------------------Shuffle---------------------------
Elliott Smith-A passing Feeling


Well, great song, doesn't answer the question at all


----------------------Shuffle---------------------------
Dixie Chicks- Ready to Run


The title makes me feel sad


----------------------Shuffle---------------------------
Amy Grant- O Come all ye faithful


Oh HELL, what is going on here?!?!?!?!?!


----------------------Shuffle--------------------------
Dave Matthews Band- Crush


AND WE HAVE A WINNNNER!






I want to take all my previous statements back, the shuffle feature just makes you a bit more depressed, anxious, possibly creates a bad taste in your mouth. 


Lesson Learned- erase some music from my library.


In Jest,
KnM